The other day, a friend stopped by to tell me about a tremendous and totally unexpected blessing for him and his family—a potentially life-changing opportunity, the culmination of months of surrender, trust, and striving to God’s will even when it didn’t seem to make sense.
The opportunity was so good, in fact, that it was hard to look at it squarely and accept that it wasn’t a mirage. If this was God’s plan all along, what was the purpose of roundabout way in which it had come about?
We talked about several possible reasons for his long and circuitous journey, then I said, “Maybe it’s not fruitful to try to figure out in hindsight what God was doing. You and your bride discerned well at the time; maybe now is just the time to say, ‘Thank you, Jesus.’”
He laughed and shook his head: “That seems like good advice.”
It does. Maybe I should take it myself.
In recent weeks I’ve been struggling—struggling to accept what’s happening with my aging father, to enjoy my children while they are home this summer, to juggle travel and work, to stay rested and healthy. But last week, as I was visiting our grown children and grandchildren, I realized that God is blessing us tremendously. In the midst of the hardest year of my life, He is giving me everything. I just need to recognize and receive it.
Why is it so hard to receive God’s blessings?
Maybe the Cross gets in the way: We struggle to see the good amidst the trials and temptations of this life. Maybe we don’t think we deserve it: We can’t imagine anyone loving us enough to give us our heart’s desires, so we limp along on something less.
Or perhaps we judge by the world’s standards: If something appears to be too good to be true, it usually is, so we raise an eyebrow and ask, “What’s the catch, Lord?”
I struggle with all three of these. As a result, it’s hard for me to let the Lord love me—to open myself to His mercy, His grace, and all the countless good gifts He gives me every day and simply say thank you.
If I’m honest, I also struggle with the realization that I can’t earn or repay His generosity. I am a little purple hatchling, blind and featherless, gaping upward at my Father and squawking so He’ll feed me.
But He does. Every day.
Jesus tells us, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:3). This poverty of spirit is nothing other than realizing that we are beggars, dependent on God for everything. But the blessing is that He provides us with everything, if we can open ourselves to receive it.
Let us pray together: Lord, help me to receive the blessings meant for me today with a grateful heart. Help me to accept that I cannot earn or repay your generosity—that I am entirely in your hands, reliant on your infinite mercy. Help me to let you love me. Amen.